Around this time last year, I was burnt out. I had been back in MA for 5+ months, got a job at a local café, and had been knocking on door after door for help in making my own café dreams a reality. But time and time again those doors would slam shut or I’d take one step in and turn around realizing that wasn’t actually a helpful path for me. This was exhausting and discouraging.
The day before Lent began last year, I was sitting and talking with a friend in the new office that was proof of her dream becoming an actual reality. It was amazing to see her at this point! She asked how my dream was going and I was honest about the cycle I seemed to be stuck in. As I lamented to her and she patiently listened, I heard the Holy Spirit speak to my heart. And He literally just said, “take a break from it for all of Lent.” Woah. Immediately I started asking probing questions like, how could I take a step back if I wanted this to happen sooner rather than later? It didn’t make sense and it made me anxious to think about and yet… it also gave me a lot of peace. This was a set time to simply place it in God’s hands and stop trying so hard.
During that Lent I ended up running a Confirmation retreat with two of my best friends for a former colleague of mine. It was during this time that I was reminded how much I love running retreats and giving faith-based talks. It was through this that God gave me the nudge to turn my Present Catholic blog into something more. I had considered it before, but was keeping it in my back pocket for a later time. One dream at a time, right? Well, I began looking into updating my website for that purpose but again kept hitting roadblocks with my old platform. And then Lent ended.
I thought, well my time working on that has run out so now I have to get back to the café. But to be honest, I was still not feeling super energized about the idea of pounding the pavement again. Around this time, I was out to dinner with those same two friends and once again I was lamenting about the closed doors. One friend asked, “Did God tell you to start working on the café again after Lent?” I kinda scoffed and said “No. But He just said to take a break during Lent.” She nodded and we moved on to other topics. But that stuck with me. Was I forcing my way again based on some timeline I had come up with and cemented into my head?
I’d love to say I figured things out quickly, but I did not. I kept dragging my feet with both dreams. I painstakingly tried to update my website but my vision and the design options I was able to use never lined up. That’s when I started considering another platform I’d used before, one that I’d had a ton of ease and fun using. It would just mean spending more money… money I “didn’t have”. When I finally got around to switching it was like a dream in and of itself how much easier it was to update and get things how I envisioned them. (Side note- I ended up spending more money because I kept delaying the transfer to this platform so my old subscription renewed before I did it… Pro tip- Listen right away when God nudges you! Haha)
Now, I’m here. Launching my new website, speaking career, Etsy store and with even more in the works! Does this mean I’m done with the café dream? Absolutely not. However, it’s taught me (yet again) that God’s ways and God’s timing are not mine. And that’s a good thing. I’m loving unleashing my creative side in this way while also getting to stay at a café I’m thriving at with customers I’ve adored getting to know. It’s the best of both worlds right now and I just know that God will use all of this for my own café in ways I could never have seen the importance of beforehand.
So all this is to say, we were created by a God who thinks so much BIGGER than us and doesn’t shrink back from the idea of multiple dreams being able to coexist. If God wants something accomplished, and you’re a willing accomplice, nothing is going to stop Him- especially not two, three, four or more dreams that glorify Him all being worked towards at once. We serve a God of abundance and He is never outdone in generosity.
What’s a dream you have on your heart? Have you spoken this dream out loud to God? If you’re afraid of putting words to it because it might lead to disappointment just remember, every day you hold it in you’re already living disappointed whether you realize it or not. God CREATED you to DREAM and to participate in His creative work. Ask Him to bring into reality what He’s already put on your heart and watch the surprises begin to unfold before you.